don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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