I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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