Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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