She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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