Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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