i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
