yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
