i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I would fuck him just for his dog
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