I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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