I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
