I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
