hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Randomize
