I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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