omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
