The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Randomize
