i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
