So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
