Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Randomize
