I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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