Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize