fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
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