As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
