I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize
