it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
