the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
kristin has been a bad kristin
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
