What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
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