Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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