He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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