pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
