Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
