Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
