I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
