i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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