my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Randomize
