am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
