i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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