But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
