He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
