So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
pop tarts are not kleenex
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
