I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
