Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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