the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
