Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Randomize
