cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
