Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Randomize
