I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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