I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
