I wish I could teleport
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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