Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
