i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
So I just went to clothing optional bar
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
