She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
